Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Excuses

I know...I said I was going to get back on track. I said I would start exercising again. I said I would start eating right. I said I would start yesterday. And I totally did!

But, you see, there is all this delicious chocolate sitting around the house calling me. Mocking me, really. A smaller person (and yes, I mean in size) would say get rid of it. Give it away. Throw it away. Share it with your children. But a true chocoholic would NEVER consider such atrocities. There is really only one solution. Eat it. Eat it all. Eat it quickly. As soon as it is gone, the temptation will be removed and the whole eating right thing can start again. So I'm not really cheating on my diet...I am preparing for success!

And as for the exercise. I totally plan to do it! Really. But I stayed up really late last night doing chores. And it was REALLY cold in our room this morning because our heating unit is still not working. And I just couldn't get out of that warm toasty bed into the frigid morning air! And when nature called and forced me out...well then I had to get ready for tutorial...I can't be late the first day back. And then there is the whole decision of what to do. Our treadmill died and as much as I want to commit to her, I just can't handle Jillian at 5 a.m. I tried...I can't. I have done a few Sparkpeople workouts but every day and they start to get dull. And if you think I am getting my ever growing rump outside and starting to jog or run in these frigid temperatures, well, you need to go eat a little chocolate until you come to your senses! Is it really MY fault that God didn't give me the love for physical exertion that he gave some?

I say we band together. There was a time in history that plumpness was beautiful. Look at all the fine art. Do you see skinny little ladies starving themselves? I think not. They are plump beauties enjoying the finer things. Will you join me in the cause? You know the old saying: Thin may be in, but fat is where it's at! Embrace it, my fellow bloggers, embrace it!

Interestingly, all these portly women seemed to have been painted, well, without clothing! I was going to include a picture of a voluptuous beauty of old, but it is most difficult to find one who is also dressed. I do not recommend we go this far, ladies. Clothing is my friend and the camouflage for many unfortunate results of chocoholic binges gone bad. Since this is a family friendly site and since I promised Tigerfan this would be a quick post, a picture will NOT be included. Use your imagination. Or Google. You decide! And feel free to indulge in a little something while you do!

5 comments:

Dawn @ simply transparent said...

preparing for success!
I love it!

Well actually I'm doing something new and will be sharing with you all soon enough.

Let's just say it's a 180 from the old me!

Cute post! Great Honesty

Aimee said...

I say bring back the portliness of yore!

And everyone knows that eating chocolate quickly cuts the calorie content in half, right? :)

Lea @ CiCis Corner said...

What an entertaining blog! I loved it and absolutely agree with everything you said. You go girl!!

Growin' With It said...

one of my favorite words is vuluptious and although it may mean something else, i like to think that it describes the figure i'd like to have. curvy is in baby!!

Debbie said...

Lets Band Together! HEALTHY does not equal skin & bones. And it doesn't mean never enjoying chocolate or sweets, either. Learning how to do it all in moderation is the trick - the hard part - and that's my big struggle. That's why my 5 lbs a month is my goal - rather than looking at the iceberg size number of weight I need to lose to get healthy. =) I plan to keep curves - it's how I'm built - how God made me and I'm gonna enjoy it! Just in a bit smaller way. lol