What I Learned This Week

1. If you are doing your first ever bloggy giveaway and you moderate your comments, be VERY CAREFUL because if you highlight all said comments and then accidentally press reject...it erases them. All of them. FOREVER! If you are reading this and happen to be one of those unfortunate commenters who was forever erased, you might want to go back here and re comment before Wednesday so I will include you!

2. Apparently kindergarten cheer leading can be a very lucrative business. Friday, Dancer announced that she couldn't wait until Saturday! I, of course, had to ask why.

Dancer: very matter of factly, "Tomorrow, I get paid!"

Me: "And what are you getting paid for?"

Dancer: "Cheering."

Me: "You are getting PAID to do cheer leading?"

Dancer: rolling her eyes and looking at me as if I am the stupidest person ever, "No, Mom, Papaw pays me for GOOD cheer leading!"

So, there ya go...something you might want to check into in this repressed economy.

3. And on a more serious note, I am doing a great Bible Study written by Priscilla Shirer, Beth Moore and Kay Arthur...how can that NOT be a good Bible Study!?! Anyway, I have done a lot of soul searching and have really tried to apply the study. Maybe no one else has the problem I do...but I LOVE to do Bible Studies, love to learn and grow, but often when they are through, I find myself right where I was before. I am really trying to not do that this time. To dig deeper and do it more for me than for checking it off or so I am not embarrassed because I didn't get my homework done. So, this week, my AHA! moment came when thinking about where I have been, where I am now and where I want to be.

We talked about times when we have been angry or afraid with God and how we have to make the choice to move beyond those moments. I wouldn't say that I am angry with God...but I think I often question why. Why do we struggle financially when so and so doesn't? Why does that person seem successful in everything and I just struggle to make it through a day with clean clothes and safe children? Why is one person good at everything they touch and I am 36 and still haven't figured out what I am good at? Let's just be honest...why is she skinny, pretty, outgoing....when I still need to lose 10-15 pounds of "baby weight", my hair is stuck in 1990 and I freeze and want to run into a closet in any new social situation?

But this week, what I am learning is that I have allowed myself to become stuck in the why's instead of moving beyond them. I also realized that ultimately, I am terrified of failing. As a result, I have chosen not to do so many things I wish I would have done because I don't want to fail, don't want to see someone else do better, don't want to be heartbroken if I don't succeed. I often wonder how God is going to use me, what can I do...and this week I wondered...has He planned something for me that I have missed because I was too afraid to trust Him with it.

David wanted to build a house for the Ark, but God promised David to build a house for him instead and David praised God asking, "Who am I?" Have I missed that Who am I moment out of fear or busyness or lack of trust? I pray I haven't. So this week, I am going to try not to be afraid, to take a risk, to put myself out there and not wonder "what if" but rather "what if I don't?"