From a Momma's Heart

Wow!  By the end of this week, we will have been in SLC for one month.  In a way, it feels like it couldn't have possibly been a whole month already and in a way, I think, how could we have possibly done all we have in only a month!

We are starting to get into a routine...and that should be good, but to be honest today, I am feeling a little sad and nostalgic.  Forgive me for the emotions, but this is my journal spot so I want to put down everything and one day look back and see how God used even the not so pretty.

I don't like change.  I am a creature of habit.  I go to the same restaurants and order the same meals, I read the same kinds of books and my furniture never moves once I have placed it...which was quite obvious when we began to move that furniture out of our house!  :)  I knew that this adventure was a BIG change, but I was excited about it.  I was excited about living close to my family again and I was excited to be a part of a full time ministry.  I was actually embracing change!

But change is just really hard for me...so while parts are good, I find myself still struggling.  I LOVE being near my family and even have loved being in the house with my parents again...that could  have been all kinds of bad but so far, it has been nothing but a blessing.  I have been blessed to get a job really easily...I didn't even interview!  My kids all got established into their schools and we couldn't be happier with their teachers.  So, I should be ecstatic.  But I am struggling.

To be honest, I haven't really even shared this with Chris much.  He is LOVING his job and loving being in ministry.  He is probably becoming a top customer at half the area coffee shops and he is in his element planning and talking and doing.  He is so excited to get clubs off the ground and really pouring himself into the people here.  I am finding myself a little...lost, maybe?

Part of it is just the change, but part of it is the busyness.  I have not worked outside the home in many years and I have had my children close to me all the time.  Things are different here.  The big kids have to leave the house by 6:45 to get to school on time and the little ones leave with my mom at 7:00.  I don't have to be to work until 10:30 so I have been trying to do a little work for my dad, do some housekeeping, run errands, etc.  I work from 10:30-3:30.  Chris picks up the big kids from school and my momma has been getting the little ones.  They get out at 2:40, but my school does not release until 3:30 so they just have to hang out in my momma's room until I can come get them.  We then go home and start homework and get supper and do laundry and before I know it, bedtime has come and I haven't had even a moment to just sit down and enjoy being with my kids...AND, I am tired and cranky so I'm often not very nice to them.  I know this is every working mom's dilemma, I am just new to the game!  Cooper cries before school every day and it is just completely breaking my heart.  I feel so bad abandoning him to traditional school and feel guilty for the short time I invested in home schooling him...yet, I know that is what we have to do right now and it is probably good for him because he is REALLY attached to me.

Chris has me signed up as a volunteer and is encouraging me to get started and to begin to invest in discipling our female volunteers and begin planning the Wyldlife meetings and maybe go with him to the Young Life meetings...but I am just tapped out.  I know this is why we are here.  I want to be in this ministry  and yet I am already finding myself so bogged down in just living that the ministry feels like a burden.

So, sorry for a depressing post, but this is where I am right now.  I know that some of this is just the growing pains that we experience when we start a new period of life but please pray for my attitude and that I will find the joy of ministry.   Please pray that I can work through the changes and find a love and passion for the people that we are here to serve.

We visited a church Sunday that the kids really seemed to like...pray that we will be drawn to the church family that God wants us to be a part of  and that I will make that decision unselfishly.

Please also continue to pray for the sale of our house.  We are still waiting on some of the improvements to be made...it is frustrating not being there to push things along.  Our realtor is not going to officially list the house until the work is completed, so right now, we are just at a standstill.  This is so frustrating and I have to keep reminding myself that God is bigger than these tiny circumstances that seem insurmountable...he can send someone to that house whenever the time is right so I just need to calm down and trust His goodness, but that is hard.

Pray also for Brooks and Chris' parents as they are still there.  We talk to Brooks at least once a day and he is loving school but is really wishing he lived on campus and at those times when there are resident life activities that he isn't a part of, he starts feeling a little lonely.

Despite all the depressing, we are abundantly blessed.  The people here are amazing, I get to be close to my family and we are meeting some great kids!  We also get sweet, encouraging messages from TN friends so often and it is good to know that we have not, yet, been forgotten.  We love all of you who are praying and encouraging us.  Thank you!

Quick Update

Sooo...it has been awhile since I posted but things have been CRAZY!!!   I still don't have a lot of time, so I am going with the short version (for me) of life right now.  My mom and dad came to TN to help us get packed up and moved.  The 26 foot moving van that we rented was not big enough and we had to rent a U-haul trailer to pull behind my car...and leave a lovely little stash of goodies in the garage for whoever wanted to come claim them.

On August 2nd, we said a heart-wrenching goodbye.  I knew it wouldn't be easy, but leaving Chris' family and Brooks behind was AWFUL, the children were devastated to say goodbye and LOTS of tears were shed.  We got a late start and didn't roll into Lincoln (our first night's stop) until about 1 am...I won't even go into detail about Chris' "short-cut" by-pass through Kansas City!  :)

We arrived in SLC on Tuesday, Aug. 4 and I promptly went the wrong way to my parent's house!  Thank goodness for GPS or I would be a hermit now!

We took a couple of days to unpack...read FILL a storage unit and every nook and cranny in my parents' house!  My sisters are now making fun of the huge amount of clothing we have and we are learning to live minimally, sort of!

Chris then settled into figuring out this job of his and I began trying to get the kids registered for school.  Oh. My. Goodness!  Why didn't someone tell me how hard it was to get kids into school?  I had no idea how easy home schooling was until I tried to do something different!  Yikes!  We  finally have everyone a home!  Brooks started Union today (sob!).  Adam and Lilly will start tomorrow, Adam at Olympus High School and Lilly at Olympus Jr. High.  Cooper and Annet start next week at the school my mom teaches at.  Everyone, including momma is excited but have some butterflies about this new step!

I have a new school home, too.  I am working a little for my dad but I also got a job as a 4-6 grade aide in an Autistic Unit at one of the local Elementary schools.  I am a little nervous but it is a great way to get my foot in the door in the area and the hours are good.

We have had a couple of chances to meet some of "our kids".  We attended a camp reunion party and last night Chris and Adam went to play Ultimate Frisbee with some of the kids.  I hear that Adam is quite the Ultimate Frisbee player...I had no idea!

I know that as school starts and I start working, things are bound to get even crazier, so I wanted to just check in and let everyone know what is going on.  I hope to be able to find a window to do updates at least once a week.

For our TN friends, we miss you like crazy!

How can you pray for us?

• Pray for Brooks as he begins classes at Union.  Pray he adjusts to his new schedule and school workload...and Jackson peeps, feel free to make sure he is doing homework and getting to class!
• Pray for the kids as they start school.  I know they are a little nervous.  Pray especially that each of them would find at least one person to begin building a friendship with.
• Pray for our house to get finished up and officially listed.  We have people coming to do work that are not being really quick about it...we NEED to get this house on the market!
• Pray for the sale of our house.  Lilly has been allowed in her school under  provisional enrollment.  If we do not move into the boundaries, she will not be allowed to attend next year. I do not want her to have to make another BIG school change.  This is the one that is really stressing me...I know, God's timing, just being real.
• Pray for Chris as he figures out what he is doing...things are a little overwhelming now and he is still trying to do fundraising as well.
• Pray that God will lay on the hearts of people to give.  This ministry is not possible without the support of our financial partners.

Please let me know how we can be praying for you.  More stuff soon...maybe!